Until I started editing my father's writings, I never fully understood the depth of his pain. You would think it wouldn't be hard for me because I don't think I could handle my own mother deteriorating before my eyes. But, he is such a solitary and strong man that he did not allow me to see his agony. Maybe he did, maybe I did not want to see it.
As a grandchild, I had somewhat of a distance to my grandmother's illness, most...intentional. I wanted to remember her from before, like when she made cookies for us, or Christmas morning. I know that is selfish on my part, and I have guilt for that but I knew that I could do nothing for her.
My mother obviously proved to be a strong woman throughout this ordeal. I can only imagine how it pained her to watch my "solid as a rock" father be impacted by his mother's illness. I hope my wife Kristi will be as strong as mom has been throughout his life. Whether it be not working until my sister and I were in school, being at almost all of our extracurricular activities, or being there for my father in his most painful times, mom has proven her worth as a mother, wife, and a human being.
My father is one of the most loving, caring, intelligent men that I know. He is a success to me in every sense of the word. To read his thoughts helped me know that it is okay to wonder if you are doing good enough. It is okay if I wonder, because my father would do anything for anyone who needed help, and he has doubts. By reading his words, he once again has allowed me to reach a level of knowledge well before I would have without them. He is a great man.
Alzheimer's is a strong competitor in life. It is prevalent in my family as well as Kristi's. I hope that in the coming years as dad's and mom's health starts to decline, as is inevitable, and whether it be Alzheimer's or not that I have the strength, courage, and perseverance to do the right thing as he did and as he will continue to do.
In closing, I want to tell you both, Mom and Dad, I love you. You raised two successful children, you have four amazing grandchildren and more in the future. I know that you have done everything you can to help Jennifer and me, Grandma Hunter, Grandpa Hunter, Grandpa Jones, Grandma Jones, and many, many others. You should never feel guilty for anything because if more people lived their lives as you do, the world would be a much kinder, loving place.
Perry Hunter
